Wednesday, June 11, 2014

I don't know. He does.

I sure hope you're ready for this post.

I'm not sure I am.

Today was a big day in the God department and I just gotta share.

I've been having a hard time with leaving the field even though it's clear it's my Abba Father's will. This morning as I guided our current guests, new friends from Ukraine, into the city I warned them I might get emotional. I didn't want them to be worried if I started to weep as I've found myself doing lately. 

The familiar pathways. The convenient transportation. The joyous relationships. The longing of my heart. From time to time it all becomes too much to contain. 

I introduced Mark and Kim to Saint Wenceslas Square, the Old Markets, Boom, Old Town Square, and the Astronomical Clock. Then we went up into the Old Town Hall Tower. Seeing Prague from this height is something I've waited more than two years to do. The view was everything I'd hoped it would be; glorious, expanding, delightful, sobering, peaceful, joyous, and even somehow empowering.

We returned to the Square and stood in its center. I offered directions on how to walk to Charles Bridge and headed to the Mucha Museum. I suddenly realized this museum visit was the last item on my To Do Before I Leave list. 

The agony struck again.

LORD, I feel as if You're asking me to plunge headfirst into the Grand Canyon. In case You aren't aware, I may not survive. As a matter of fact, I'm only poised on the rim and I already hurt.

Sandra, keep the eyes of your heart focused on Me. Remember I am the great I AM. I not only know your future. I sculpted it for you. The impressions I gave you from the top of the Tower describe your coming days; glorious, expanding, delightful, sobering, peaceful, joyous, and even somehow empowering. It won't all be easy, but I'm right here with you.

"But now, this is what the LORD says - 
he who created you, O Jacob,
he who formed you, O Israel:
'Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are mine.
When you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.
For I am the LORD, your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior; 
I give Egypt for your ransom,
Cush and Seba in your stead. 
Since you are precious and honored in my sight,
and because I love you,
I will give men in exchange for you,
and people in exchange for your life.
Do not be afraid, for I am with you."  Isaiah 43:1-3,5

Hmmmm, could it be that instead of taking a terrifying leap into a canyon my Abba Father is about to teach me how to swan dive into something like the beautiful and healing waters around Cayman? 

Maybe I'm ready to go after all. 

How about you? Are your toes gripping an edge?


  1. Yes. Toes gripping an edge with you. The book of Isaiah is like my security blanket that I find comfort in when I am struggling. Isaiah 43 is an excellent passage. I take great comfort in a powerful, righteous, holy, unchanging God who is willing to condescend to tenderly love and take up for His children in their distress. Praying for you as say goodbye to Prague.

    1. Grabbing your hand as we stand here together.
      Thankfully our Abba Father has two. ;-) <3

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  3. Praying for you these last couple of days in Prague.

    1. Thanks, Leslie. Being out of the flat with less than 24 hours to go is an interesting phase. Your prayers are appreciated.
      May God bless you for them.